How To Choose Your Wedding Party

Friends and family. They are wonderful, aren’t they?! They can provide grounding and support throughout life.

But sometimes, anxiety can creep in around these special relationships, especially when planning for your wedding. It could be the expectations that come out of nowhere from Aunt Carol about who to invite and which florist to choose.

More commonly, we all get a little anxious about who to include in the wedding party.

You might be nervous about making someone feel left out, potential drama later on, your parent’s having strong opinions, or how you can make sure your wedding party enjoys their experience.

What is amazing is that these days no “rule book” has authority on how many people to ask, if you can only ask ladies if you’re a gal or dudes if you’re a guy, or how to ask them. I’ve worked with coupes who had zero people in their wedding party, guys and gals on both sides of the aisle, and large wedding parties. All of these weddings were incredible and so much peace and joy were present.

Unsure if having peace in this process is possible for you?

That’s okay. I was uncertain too. Let me share my process with you. It is not foolproof and there is no guarantee that drama will not creep in. However, this process can aid in minimizing drama, anxiety, and stress, specifically around choosing your wedding party.

The process I created involves a number of questions. Some will be easy to answer, some questions will require more time and deeper reflection, but in the end, I hope you walk away with a confidence in who you should ask to join your wedding party.

Remember, these are just my questions. Keep your personal values in mind as you go through THIS PROMPT.

In case you skipped to the end, here is THE WEDDING PLANNING WORKSHEET to help navigate choosing your wedding party.

Wanting to involve a few more friends on your wedding day? No problem! For those good pals who aren’t part of the wedding party, you can ask them to be part of your special day in a few ways:

  • Of course, invite them to your wedding.

  • Invite them to a wedding shower or even a bachelorette or bachelor party.

  • Ask them to help take home your gifts or monitor your guestbook.

  • Ask them (and potentially pay them, if not part of their gift) to design your invitations, create a special cake, floral piece, or art for a shower or your wedding day.

  • Ask them to share a special song during the ceremony or reception.

  • Look at their talents and what they enjoy doing to see where you can include them in this joyful season.

Remember, at the end of the day, you and your love are worth celebrating and all of your dearest friends and family are cheering you on!

All my love,